And All That Jazz

Maybe it's because I tend to hover around Starbucks and the college campuses of Chicago where the elite scholars of the Midwest tend to dwell, but I have to say

Chicago is FULL of attractive men.

AND I HATE IT.

I didn't move from New York City where the buff bods of Chelsea made me feel like Charlie Bucket and only the creepy dudes with candy would pursue me. Now, I have to walk down the streets of Chicago feeling like every cover of People's Sexiest Man is passing me on their way to a Cub's game.

Baseball is still happening...right?

I was supposed to leave "New York Cute" to become "Chicago Hot". Now, I just feel "Portland Pretty", and God KNOWS the Pacific Northwest has nothing to offer.

JK, my ex-boyfriend lives there and he's successful and beautiful and I would marry him tomorrow.

But maybe that's just my broke bank account and broken ego talking.

Regardless, I'm back to living off coffee and oxygen, lifting every heavy object I can find in the hopes of gaining attention from that dude-with-the-double-wide-stroller. YES my target market may be off, but this jawline is a BULLSEYE.

I may not have a biological clock, but I can tell when desperation is setting in.

Setting-in in 5...4...3...2...

TJB: Making It