Of Models and Manhattan

After 12 hours of travel, I finally made it back to NYC.

But as the plane descended, so did my heart. Why is it that every arrival in New York City feels like the first?

I had said August was my month, and if you care to read August's posts, you'll find it was a lot of talkin n' tears...so I was ready for the new start of September regardless of whose month it was. 

Like the first day of school it was for most of America, I too was concerned with what to wear, what to bring, and who to talk to first. Four days away from this city and it has already forgotten about you. I really could have to start all over again.

In fact, just one hour into my first work shift and someone said, "You're not from here are you?"

Bitch please, go back to Long Island. I may not be from here, but your highlights are HEINOUS.

At least my agent hadn't forgotten about me, and I woke up early to prep for my first audition of the new New York school year.

And as anyone who has auditioned knows: four days away and that's like starting over too. I tried my best to stay out of my head, but when I arrived with enough time to check myself out in the bathroom mirror I noticed something strange...

More attractive boys than usual...

I had memorized the character breakdowns and knew there was only one role that could possibly be filled by these tall, fit, and exceedingly attractive young men

and I'm pretty sure I wanted that role to be filled by me

so how in trouble WAS I?

Then I saw it. The last door on the right before the bathrooms.

"FASHION WEEK MODEL FITTINGS"

Oh. Hell. No.

Not only did I have to sit amongst the buff MT boys who made me feel too thin, I had to watch all the Eastern European runway boys pass by who made me feel too fat.

My first day of school was proving to be quite the ego boost...

As my audition slot approached and my confidence sank, my Midwestern morals made themselves heard and I thought

"Oh snap. One of these Russians is totally going to jack my shit as soon as I step into that room."

And without being able to calm my prejudice so freshly renewed by my weekend in the country, I picked up my entire proud-to-be-American Army-official ACU backpack and carried it into my audition...

I awkwardly dropped the mammoth knapsack at the door as if I was moving in while my face made an awkward surprised-face due to the fact there were 25 people in the room and I expected 4.

The first thing out of my mouth?

"WHOW lots of people. Did you guys know there are MODEL fittings down the hall?"

cue awkward silence and a few unsure chuckles that should have convinced me to close my mouth

"I mean SERIOUSLY, these MT guys are bad enough and now I have to watch these Russian* dudes strut around? Today is not my day."

Needless to say, I think my agents can forgo this commission...

Sorry 'bout it.

But it was the first time I went 24 hours without a drink in a week, so at least we know I'm not an alcoholic.

The little things,

TJB: Making it

*Note: most of the models were probably American, but admitting such would really bruise my ego.


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