welcome to my home

The greatest thing about leaving NYC to do a regional show is that housing is paid for.

Not paying rent is the best thing that's happened to me since not booking RENT.

My roommate and I thought we were in for a treat when we learned about the shooting just down the block...

...but then we got to know our neighbors...

Have we met our neighbors? NO. But, thanks to paper-thin walls and some very VERY resonant voices (along with two raging tempers) we've gathered some information about the colorful pair next door.

Things we know: There are two of them.

Things we know about roommate #1:
1. She is a girl.
2. She has the front bedroom.
3. Her boyfriend's name is either Wayne or Myron
4. She calls him every day to break up.
5. She is upset he won't change his relationship status on Facebook.
6. She likes make-up sex.

Things we know about roommate #2:
1. NOT the gender (strong cases to be made for both given vocal range and sexual position preferences).
2. A man is involved.
3. They too love make-up sex.
4. Knows all the words to DJ Drama's "Ain't No Way Around It" (take a listen...)
5. A dog with extreme separation anxiety is involved.
6. The dog needs a bigger cage but the man refuses to purchase it.
7. Roommate is angry the man will not pick the dog up and take it to get proper shots at vet.
8. Favorite phrases include "Aww HELL NO" and "F*CK that sh*t!"
9. Don't answer the phone if this roommate calls you. Only yelling will ensue.

Our hearts reach out to them in their endless emotional turmoil. We have questioned many times how to help the situation.

And then we realized we haven't had to turn our television on once because we are LIVING the best reality TV you could hope for.

KEEP ON FIGHTING LADIES!!...um...LADY AND GENT!!...

Until it stops, we rival their battle cries with the booming marches of BAND GEEKS.

Dayton is decidedly NOT for lovers,

TJB: Making It