Ginger Slapz

There have been quite a few notable characters in my blog over the past year and a half, but no character will ever be as infamous as the original:

The Ginger.

To be honest, THE Ginger may actually be several gingers, but when they all seem to be 5'9" bundles of muscle with a pension for talking and a Super Cuts original hairstyle, there's no use in distinguishing. I had even placed a name with The Ginger. After his second blog post appearance, a friend of mine was convinced he knew just which ginger it was. "Randy".

Randy was a rather infamous character in the MT community. He was young, cute, talented, and dating a famous director. He had even recently signed with my agency, and I've been following his career ever since.

So when I got an e-mail from my agent last week offering me a film job I didn't audition for, I accepted it without hesitation until he told me

you'll be playing the boyfriend of [The Ginger].

I freaked. I laughed. I panicked. But I accepted twice as eagerly knowing this was my chance to finally meet the boy I had written about for so long.

SIDE NOTE: I ran into a ginger at a final callback the night before filming with Randy. I assumed it was Randy and approached him as such, and only accepted that he was not actually Randy when the Casting Director called him Andrew...sorry Andrew.

When I showed up at the filming location, it wasn't long before I saw the flames of fury crossing Madison Square Park. I could hardly contain myself through the introduction. Suddenly, I was Andy Warhol meeting my new muse. The word vomit was flowing and I had practically exposed myself as a full-on stalker by the time the producer told us

this was not our filming location. We would have to move up to Central Park as soon as he could figure out where in Central Park the film team was. I had another hour and a half to make smalltalk with The Ginger before we even saw a camera.

THAT will teach you to keep your mouth shut. I had already shown that I knew everything about him, and now I had to sit and stare at him wondering if playing my boyfriend is a healthy decision for his career and personal safety.

Turns out, it wasn't...because the film was called "No Excuse for Abuse" and I was chosen as the abusive boyfriend in the relationship. So, once we ACTUALLY started filming halfway into our MAX call time (this is why you join unions kids), I spent another 2 hours slapping Randy and shouting profanities in his face while chasing him through Central Park.

The Asian tourists were terrified of our amazing acting abilities.

Luckily, throughout the extra 3 hours of filming between the screaming matches, I got to know Randy.

Here's a snippet:

Me: "I wrote about you in a blog."
Randy: "You read about me in a blog?"
Me: "No...I wrote about you in a blog."
Randy: "Oh...that's...why?"
Me: "Well, I used to run into you at auditions all the time and when I described you to my friend who knows you from NYU, he told me it was definitely you, and then I kept seeing you, but never introduced myself...until today."
Randy: "Where have you seen me?"

I described every situation in which I had come across Randy and it turns out...

I've never come across Randy in my life.

You know how they say you should never meet your heroes? Apparently, you should never meet your gingers either.

Here's hoping I get that job and not Andrew,

TJB: Making It