Hurricane Sandy is a Basic BITCH

I know my national/international readers have been very concerned about my well-being during this storm.

I'm no stranger to devastating weather. A tornado ripped through my hometown back in 1996. My parents were at a concert, I was 7, and my 14 year old cousin was babysitting. I couldn't have pointed where my house was on the weather map, but my cousin was pretty sure we were well out of the danger zone. So, I went to sleep and thought nothing of it.

The next day, my parents took us into town to see the damage. Trees were everywhere, buildings had been flattened, and houses ripped off their frames. I think that was when I learned the world still exists while you're sleeping.

But New York City is not a place where catastrophic storms exist. Hurricane Irene felt more irritating than devastating last year (I wouldn't really know. I was on tour. I was a working actor then...) So when Hurricane Sandy came looming in the distance, I had a hard time taking the warnings seriously. Not here. Not New York. Not when they were still sending news reporters out into the winds.

So I pointed to my house on the weather map and decided I was safe. I went to sleep and thought nothing of it.

You can imagine the look on my face as I sat and watched cars floating down the East Side of Manhattan.The facades of buildings crumbled. The subways flooded. And even on my own street, the trees have been ripped from the ground and tossed onto cars.

Though I went through the motions, though I begrudgingly bought 4 gallons of water and 3 cans of Chef Boyardee, I did not prepare for the hurricane. I feel lucky to have been safe inside my trendy apartment in Queens playing video games and being called off work with a smerk of happiness that I had a reason to be lazy.

But now I feel stupid that I treated Sandy with the same aloofness I treat the brunette girls at auditions.

You have proven yourself a blonde, Sandy, here to be seen and heard and feared by all.

To those affected by the flooding and destruction, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I now have 8 candles with pictures of saints that I light in your honor.

To those of you stranded in Astoria like me, I'M OUT OF DIET COKE! HELP ME PLEASE!

I'll stay away from serious topics I promise,

TJB: Making It